you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
Randomize
