Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
There are huge fuckin pieces of palm tree in the road. what a road hazard. as i sit here and text you as i swerve to miss them
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
Randomize
