the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
Morning! Got your 3am VM to remind you to get up for spin class and also confirm you were not murdered by the sketchy guy at brunch yesterday. So this is your literal and metaphorical wake up call.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
found a note from drunk me saying "don't worry i fed the mice". WHAT MICE?
Randomize
