Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
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