The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
...oh my god that's like anal suicide
I'm aware. I'm writing the eulogy for my colon as we speak.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
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