Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
My birth control alarm gets more depressing every night.
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
Randomize
