brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
Randomize
