I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
Randomize
