So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
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