was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
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