idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
I just found out that my father was a Human condom for halloween when I was 4. And to think I used to wonder where my sense of humor came from.
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
Randomize
