question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
Finished my senior thesis. How am I celebrating you ask? By drinking gas station white zif out of an empty candle holder by myself. I fucking deserve to graduate.
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
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