happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
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