that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
Randomize