so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
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