dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
He told me i was the nicest person he's ever arrested for DUI
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
This can only be settled by a dance off.
Randomize
