Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
I wish i was in the wii world.
I just convinced a girl to drink my spit cup cuz I said it was dark beer and would get her drunk faster. I dare you to try something better.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
I just added a bunch of arbitrary options to my ouija board. Ghosts can now tell me "cheddar," "the homosexual agenda," "the whole foods vegan aisle," or "viable offspring"
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
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