I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
