he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
The air was thick with penises
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
I made out with a guy who was dressed as Borat
And like a minute in, I was like oh fuck what am I doing
Did you run away?
I DANCED AWAY.
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
Randomize
