i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
Randomize
