Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
I farted in his bed and then in my drunken stupor grabbed hair defanging spray to cover up the stench.
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
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