Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
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