Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
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