she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
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