she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
Randomize
