So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
Note to self: never go down on a girl first thing in the morning…its like opening a grilled cheese sandwich
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
You know you're fucked up when you decide to pour fireball whiskey in your vegetable beef soup
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
Hey, dude, is Kevin still passed out on your porch?
Yeah. I'm gonna go leave a pitcher of bloody mary next to him in case he's still alive.
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
Randomize
