Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
Randomize
