i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
i barfeds in our rink
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
Randomize
