Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Randomize
