dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
apparently i broke a 100 dollar bill to tip the bartender on a free drink
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
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