I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
Randomize
