You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
Randomize
