The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
I was sat at the table waiting with a glass of wine reading my book and the hotel staff gave me a goldfish in a bowl and said 'heres your date for the night' !
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
Randomize
