I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
Randomize
