So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
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