Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
Randomize
