So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
