Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
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