trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
Randomize
