I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
I'd cum for enchiladas.
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
Randomize
