I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
I'm drive I can fine osifer
watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
We are two peas in an std pod
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
Randomize
