So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
Randomize
