i'm signing you up for texting rehab
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
To my ex and my favorite mistake: I totally enjoyed hearing you have erectile disfunction via baby monitor!
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Randomize
