I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
I've seriously contemplated telling him the baby isn't his just so I can meet Maury Povich
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
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