Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
Randomize
