Dear everyone that texted me last night wondering where i was. i ended up face down blacked up drunk before i made it to the party. My bad
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
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