you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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