I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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