Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
And now I'm taking a break sitting on the bathroom floor thanking god that people who eat at subway are either too classy to piss on the floor, or are still relatively sober enough to not piss on the floor before 5pm.
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
Ugh hungover at a laundromat is a terrible feeling. For some reason I keep getting sucked into staring at the clothes spinning around and around and it makes me want to profusely projectile vomit everywhere
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Randomize
