I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
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